Spatula City

I found out some interesting news last week. Ok, it's not really news. It's actually quite disturbing. It's more of a rumor that I believe to be true. Regardless, it makes great blogging material. I hesitate telling you this because you may think worse of me...but hopefully you will find it as FUNNY as I do.

You know how some people consider themselves "springboards" for marriage?

For example: We have Guy A, who dates Girlfriend B. Their relationship ends. Soon after, Girl B starts to date Guy C and they end up getting married. Guy A is alone-again. So, he dates Girl D. Their relationship ends. Girl D starts dating Guy E and they get married. Guy A= Alone. Again. Well this pattern continues on and Guy A now prides himself on this talent to marry off every ex-girlfriend. He is a "springboard for marriage". Rumor gets out and girls begin to date him just because they know that once they breakup the next guy that comes along is going to be the one.

Well, I am sad to say, I am not a springboard. I am a spatula. I date a guy, we break up and the next person he dates is another GUY. I turn (or flip) them to the other side.

It happened once, and that once could happen to anyone. But, now I have started to get a little creeped out. I heard (now here's the rumor part) that another guy that I dated is now out of the closet, living with another guy-- you know GAY. Very gay. Creepy. Very Creepy. Jennica dates guy A. Break up. Guy A dates Guy B. Jennica=alone. Jennica dates Guy C. They break up. Guy C dates (and lives with) Guy D. Jennica = alone. Pattern? I think so.

I don't know if I can see this talent getting me any closer to where I want to be. So, I am not going to advertise it too much. :)

Instead of being sad about this little skill---- I actually like to think of it in a positive light. I break up with these guys and they realize that they will never find a girl as GREAT as me. So they give up looking for a GREAT girl (who can compete with JENNICA?!) and decide second best was to look for a great guy. EWWW. Sick. Find a happy place!


To end- I close with a very happy thought given by our own Michael Scott.

Angela: You know this is a luncheon shower. Girls only.

Michael Scott: No problem. The guys are having a little shindig of their own in the warehouse. From 2:30 to 3:15. That is the only time that Bob was available. Sort of a guys' night out. A 'G-N-O' if you will. A 'gno.' Actually it's more of a guys' afternoon in. A G-A-I. A gay. Not-- not... it's uh, not gay. It's, uh, just uh, it's a bridal shower for guys. A guy shower. An hour long shower with guys.